Recently, there was a discussion of beauty and cosmetics usage, etc. on Sarah's blog, which I found really interesting. So I thought I would post some ideas on the subject today. I've been doing a bit of research on this subject myself, through literature on Natural Hygiene and a couple of lectures and books by genetic psychologists and researchers. I'll try to keep what I've learned fairly brief, with the hopes that I don't leave too much background information out that might hinder understanding. Cos, let me tell you, what I've learned has been surprising.
Hygienically speaking, authorities on Natural Hygiene agree that one of the conditions of optimal health is aesthetic enjoyment--the love of beauty and being beautiful. Making ourselves beautiful and enjoying beauty around us IS delightful and natural to us. I personally believe that's why, as a society, we seem so preoccupied with diet, exercise, tanning, clothes, etc. I believe that deep down in we KNOW we should be the picture of health and beauty (even though we might go about this in really unhealthy and synthetic ways).
As it turns out, there is genetic evidence for our desire to be beautiful, and our species is pretty specific about what constitutes human beauty. In his book, The Moral Animal, Robert Wright gives us a scholarly description of the criteria for human beauty, which, by the way, is programmed right into our genes. (Despite its intellectual density, this book is a stunner and very revealing. I plan to write more about what I'm learning later.) The findings in Wright's book are supported by some lectures I attended several months ago.
Before I proceed, I realize that the information I am sharing might be surprising and, in some ways, unsettling, owing to our current cultural values. I admit I was caught by surprise, since on the surface it seems so frighteningly retrogressive. But this is why I want to share it with you. However, this book is extremely well-researched and well-documented and is considered authoritative reading for students of evolutionary psychology. In fact, it's been required reading in universities. I do hope you'll read on and share your impressions. And if you're so inclined, pick up a copy of the book and read for yourself what genetic research has uncovered.
Since the fundamental objectives of all living species are survival and reproductive success, all species have adapted certain desirable traits to attract and, in certain cases retain, reproductive partners, as well as to ensure survival. (Whether we want to admit it or not, attractive members of society do get a bigger slice of the proverbial pie--genetics helps to ensure this.) We humans are no different, and as it turns out, we are quite specific about what we instinctively (and mostly unconsciously) prefer in a mate. The following are some highlights, beginning with physical characteristics and then touching on some emotional ones.
Please note that I am speaking in highly generalized and simplified terms and NOT about any one particular person or group of people here!
While our species has specific ideas about human beauty and attractiveness, they are sexually differentiated; that is, men have their ideas about beauty and attractiveness and women have theirs. They are not alike, but they go hand-in-hand. So, I'll break each description down along gender lines. But, first, let's start with some common, universal principles.
What both genders look for in mates
All humans--male and female--are genetically attracted to people who give the impression of genetic fitness. (Apparently, the genes are receptive to being fooled--judicious deception genetically instilled as well.) We naturally incline toward mates who appear healthy and anatomically symmetrical and who seem up to the task of producing and raising healthy offspring. This is regardless of whether you want children or whether you are beyond childbearing years.
Likewise, we are universally repelled by any overt physical attributes that indicate genetic "unfitness" which might be passed on to offspring--acne and other skin conditions, disease, bad teeth, body odor, offensive bodily noises, deformity, etc. That "ick" response we sometimes feel toward certain people is genetically, not socially, driven.
Both males and females, too, are in search of lifelong mates, since we are a "pair-bonding" species; so genetically generated emotional and psychological elements come into play, too. Specifically, males look for faithful wives and females look for trustworthy husbands, and both genders look for respectability (for themselves and in each other); for these are what humans for millenia have found to ensure long term survival and reproductive success.
Women's Perspective: What constitutes male beauty and attractiveness?
In general, women are attracted to men with shapely torsos--broad shoulders and chests and slim waists. Women are enormously attracted to--get this--a scruffy appearance (Dr McDreamy?), but only during ovulation; otherwise they want men to look well-groomed and respectable (how ever the society in which they live defines them). Women look for things that indicate a man's prowess, strength, and virility (ie, his ability to protect and provide in the literal sense), as well those things that amplify his "maleness"--thicker, coarser skin, face and body hair, the smell of pheromones, large hands, etc.
Now, an interesting thing about females is that they seem only to be sexually attracted to these traits in three-dimensional form--he's gotta be in person. Male beauty shown in two-dimensional form, as in magazines and photos, do nothing for females. Not so for males--they get excited for the female form in ANY medium they can get it!
Another notable characteristic of female tastes is that she is very flexible with her man's physical appearance, because she's got many more things to concern herself with when choosing her mate. "Beauty," for a woman is also emotionally driven. Her #1 criterion is his trustworthiness. Is he really who he presents himself as? He is harboring unseen disease? Will he stick around? Male parental investment (MPI) is foremost in her mind. This can be explained by the very obvious fact that she only has one egg a year (contrast with billions of sperm a man has) that could possibly materialize as a child, followed by a lifetime of personal investment. So, she HAS to be choosy. This explains why, compared to men, women are more coy and less eager for sex (enjoyable as it is...). (The book has a lot to say about casual sex, but I'll save that for another time.)
Furthermore, a man has to do a LOT of convincing that he will not wander emotionally. While sexual infidelity is highly undesirable, woman tend to feel most threatened by emotional abandonment, which she rarely, if ever, can forgive. So--ingeniously--one adaptation females have accepted and encouraged in males is that of showing male emotional fidelity is by plying women with gifts and whispering sweet nothings into their ears. These, in fact, can override practically any physical "beauty" flaw a man might have.
Male Perspective: What constitutes female beauty and attractiveness?
Robert Wright describes the genetically driven preferences of males, too. He writes that men instinctively seek out women who are younger (longer reproductive potential), although the mere appearance of youth can overcome chronological age (Remember, genes--and humans, as it turns out--aren't averse to being fooled, so long as there's a pay-off); thus, providing strong incentive to, and justification for, women to persist in their quest for beauty no matter what age or circumstance.
Two physical features that indicate a woman's youth are large eyes and a small nose. Evidently, eyes appear smaller and the nose appears larger age we age. ...Didn't know that! I guess that explains the rush to makeup counters and plastic surgeons!
Another potent reason to be tempted to rush to the cosmetics counter is this thing called "cryptic ovulation." Now, admittedly, this is pure deception at its best, but deception is not a no-no when it comes to attracting and retaining a mate, genetically speaking. Males are especially attracted to women when they are ovulating. This is apparent physically--the color of women's irises deepen, lips go plump, cheeks go rosy, breasts swell, etc. Well, women's genes impel women to "fool" men into thinking they are ovulating even when they aren't, by making women decorate themselves so they appear to be ovulating (hence the term, cryptic ovulation). After all, a guy doesn't consciously know a woman is ovulating unless she tells him! Women having been using this trick since time immemorial, and we're no different today. If you take a look at the types of cosmetics women use, you can readily see that what women are doing is emphasizing those very features that intensify during ovulation: mascara and eyeliner to enlarge and define the eyes, blush to, well, "blush" the cheeks, lipstick to plump and redden the lips, even push-up bras to make the bosom appear perky! So, apparently, there is some deeper genetic rationale going on here...
The other enormous physical appeal is a woman's sensuality--that is, her ability to inspire a man's touch. It doesn't necessarily matter what a woman's weight or shape are (unless they're a gross indication of genetic unfitness), but whether she's "touchable." Especially appealing is touching the curve where her waist and hips meet, and the hips themselves (who knew?) and caressing her smooth, soft skin. (Mental note: pick up that new moisturizer at the store!)
There are emotional and psychological aspects to male attraction as well. The absolutely essential requirement is a woman's demonstration of fidelity--that she won't screw around (and therefore confuse him as to which kids he's supposed to love and provide for). Like women have adapted "anti-deception" genes, men have adapted "anti-cuckholdry" genes that are VERY strong. They reflect on his status, power, and respectably, not to mention his parental role (again, genetically driven impulses).
Studies show that for a man, an unfaithful mate is THE worst of all repulsion. So, in addition to physical beauty, a woman must demonstrate character traits that convince a man that she'll remain faithful. He looks for modesty and signs of complete, long term devotion to him. Extensive research reveals that dressing modestly and possessing a "delightful demeanor" toward the male, and to a certain extent toward others (since it is an indication of marital harmony and happiness), are the most potent signs of fidelity.
Now here's the rub: studies show that when a woman dresses provocatively and shows aggressive body language, males will be attracted, BUT they will moderate the amount of long term investment in the relationship. The same studies show that, when an entire society of women start dressing provocatively and behaving aggressively, they actually influence the amount of investment the men commit as a whole, sending the society into the vortex of increasingly casual sex and decreasingly male marital and parental investment, as well as contributing to social violence. I'm not kidding!
Of course, this appears to put the onus on women,; but on the flip-side, it shows how much practical influence and power they have in their society...
What I've included here are some specific features that humans find are associated with beauty and attractiveness. But, as you can see, there is a lot of room for cultural interpretation. For example, each society decides for itself what "dressy modestly," "behaving demurely," and "demonstrating trustworthiness" means. And each woman has to decide what devices she'll employ when nature calls cryptic ovulation into play.
To these ends, as Natural Hygienists, this is where we center our discussions. It's not so much should we beautify and attract--nature already determined that for us; but rather what methods do we find acceptable? Is it "hygienic" to use synthetic makeup and grooming products? [Probably not, if we consider only aspects of physical health, but not so clear if we are suddenly faced with marital crisis...] Moreover, to what extent and frequency of usage do they contribute to our natural impulses without becoming pathological (this is where self-esteem issues come into play)? And how do we pass this delicate balance on to our children?
And this isn't just a topic for female hygienists, either. After all...how many male hygienists do you know who don't shave?
What I am coming to conclude is that what matters is highly personal and relative. Each of us arrives at what we find is conducive to our comfort and survival/thrival. And I suppose it will always be a sliding scale, being subtly adjusted as from circumstance to circumstance.
I would really love to hear your input on this topic. Please share with me your ideas!
